Sunset highway(selepas Gua Tempurung PLUS)
foto by tokasid
Hidup berumahtangga memang banyak asam-garamnya.( tak masuk lagi ajinomoto,rempah ratus dan kas-kas nya).Tiada rumahtangga yang tidak digoncang angin.Cuma bezanya ada yang dapat angin sepoi-sepoi bahasa, ada dapat tengkujuh,ada dapat ribut greg atau ribut Katrina.Ada yg takda ribut terus dapat rempuhan Tsunami.
Itulah ujian berumahtangga.
Sememangnya bukan itu yang kita impikan ketika berakad nikah. Ketika juru nikah sengaja menggenggam tangan kita erat bagai hendak ber-hand wrestling lagaknya.Ketika badan berpeluh walau dalam kamar aircond.Ketika si-loyar buruk menjadi bisu.Bukan itu.
Yang kita dambakan satu rumahtangga yang aman sentosa sepanjang masa.Yang smooth sailing.Yang happy ever after.
Namun realitnya bukan begitu. Pengongsian dua individu yang berlainan karektor dan personaliti yang berlainan minat dan selera.Yang berlainan didikan dan berlainan environment ketika membesar.Yang berlainan fi'il dan berlainan tujuan dalam hidup. Pokoknya memang berlainan.Dan mereka di satukan dalam ikatan suci di sisi ALLAH Azza Wa Jalla.Mereka menyahut seruan Baginda Rasulullah s.a.w. agar bernikah. Alhamdulillah.
Tetapi lambat laun, mungkin kerana alpa dan leka,mungkin kerana berasa di comfort zone, mungkin kerana berasa tidak di pedulikan...retak mula muncul dalam alam rumahtangga.
kalau tidak di atasi segera mungkin bakal runtuh masjid yang dibina.Mungkin akan berlaku perkara halal yang paling ALLAH benci.
Jadi bagaimana ya jika ini berlaku? Apa boleh cuba di atasi ujian pergolakkan begini?
Siapa dalam alam ini yang tidak melakukan kesilapan? Adakah tiada peluang kesilapan itu di perbetulkan semula? Apa tidak mungkin peluang seterusnya untuk diperbetulkan?
Mari kita halusi nukilan seterusnya ...agar menjadi guide bagi diri kita masing-masing.InsyaALLAH.
Oh teratai bunga indah.....foto by tokasid
Buat Suami-isteri( dan yang bakal mendirikan rumahtangga)
Untuk suami(renungkanlah):
Pernikahan atau perkawinan menyingkap tabir rahsia
Isteri yang kamu nikahi tidaklah semulia Khadijah r.a.tidaklah setaqwa Aisyah r.a.
pun tidak setabah Fatimah r.a.
Justru isterimu hanyalah wanita akhir zaman
yang punya cita cita menjadi solehah...
Pernikahan atau perkawinan mengajar kita kewajiban bersama
isteri menjadi tanah kamu langit penaungnya
isteri ladang tanaman kamu pemagarnyaisteri kiasan ternakan kamu gembalanya
isteri adalah murid kamu gurunyaisteri bagaikan anak kecil kamu tempat bermanjanya
Saat isteri menjadi madu kamu teguklah sepuasnya
seketika isteri menjadi racun kamulah penawar bisanya
seandainya isteri tulang yang bengkok berhatilah meluruskannya. .Pernikahan atau perkawinan menginsyafkan kita perlunya iman dan taqwa
Untuk belajar meniti sabar dan redha Allah swt.
karena memiliki isteri yang tak sehebat manajustru kamu akan tersentak dari alpa kamu
bukanlah Rasulullah saw.pun bukanlah Sayyidina Ali Karamallahhuwajhah
cuma suami akhir zamanyang berusaha menjadi soleh... amin...
Ketenanganfoto by tokasid
Untuk isteri(renungkanlah):
Pernikahan atau perkawinan membuka tabir rahasia
Suami yang menikahi kamu tidaklah semulia Muhammad saw.tidaklah setaqwa Ibrahim alaihissalam
pun tidak setabah Ayyub alaihissalamatau pun segagah Musa alaihissalam
apalagi setampan Yusuf alaihissalamJustru suamimu hanyalah pria akhir zaman
yang punya cita cita membangun keturunan yang soleh...Pernikahan atau perkawinan mengajar kita kewajiban bersama
Suami menjadi pelindung kamu penghuninya
suami adalah nahkoda kapal kamu navigatornyasuami bagaikan balita yang nakal kamu adalah penuntun kenakalannya
saat suami menjadi raja kamu nikmati anggur singgahsananyaseketika suami menjadi bisa kamulah penawar obatnya
seandainya suami masinis yang lancang sabarlah memperingatkannya. .Pernikahan ataupun perkawinanmengajarkan kita
perlunya iman dan taqwa
Untuk belajar meniti sabar dan redha Allah Azza Wa Jallakerana memiliki suami yang tak segagah mana
justru kamu akan tersentak dari alpakamu bukanlah Khadijah r.a.
yang begitu sempurna didalam menjagapun bukanlah Hajar
yang begitu setia dalam sengsaracuma wanita akhir zaman
yang berusaha menjadi solehah...Amin ya Rabbal 'alamin
Kandungan posting mungkin ada kena mengena atau tidak dengan makhluk yang hidup atau yang telah tiada.Kalau sapa-sapa terasa nak buat macamana kan. Sapa makan cabai melaka dia pedaih laa
9 comments:
Peringatan yang sungguh tepat pada waktunya dengan kes, kes cerai yang meningkat. Sekarang ni paras rupa kriteria pertama, harta kekayaan kriteria kedua dalam mencari pasangan hidup. Satu lagi nasihat kepada kaum Adam ni. Jaga sikit la awang tu. Punca banyak kekecohan rumah tangga ialah bila awang si suami mula mengganas. Dah ada dirumah yang halal, nak jugak cari di luar yang haram.
Tokasid: This comments was posted by a Micheal Chick in my blog. What do you think:
(Reproduced here for you)
It's been interesting to read such free-flowing comments on an all "Malaysian" free for all. While we are on the subject, how many of you have read the book entitled "Contesting Malayness"? Written by a Professor of National University of Singapore. Cost S$32 (about). It reflects the Anthropologists views that there is no such race as the "Malays" to begin with. If we follow the original migration of the Southern Chinese of 6,000yrs ago, they moved into Taiwan, (now the Alisan), then into the Phillipines (now the Aeta) and moved into Borneo (4,500yrs ago) (Dayak). They also split into Sulawesi and progressed into Jawa, and Sumatera. The final migration was to the Malayan Peninsular 3,000yrs ago. A sub-group from Borneo also moved to Champa in Vietnam at 4,500yrs ago.
Interestingly, the Champa deviant group moved back to present day Kelantan. There are also traces of the Dong Song and HoaBinh migration from Vietnam and Cambodia. To confuse the issue, there was also the Southern Thai migration, from what we know as Pattani today. (see also "Early Kingdoms of the Indonesian Archipelago and the Malay Peninsular")
Of course, we also have the Minangkabau's which come from the descendants of Alexander the Great and a West Indian Princess. (Sejarah Melayu page 1-3)
So the million Dollar Question... Is there really a race called the "Malays"? All anthropologists DO NOT SEEM TO THINK SO.
Neither do the "Malays" who live on the West Coast of Johor. They'd rather be called Javanese. What about the west coast Kedah inhabitants who prefer to be known as "Achenese"? or the Ibans who simply want to be known as IBANS. Try calling a Kelabit a "Malay" and see what response you get... you’ll be so glad that their Head-Hunting days are over.
In an article in the Star, dated: Dec 3rd 2006
available for on-line viewing at:
http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2006/12/3/focus/16212814&sec=focus
An excerp is reproduced here below:
"The Malays – taken as an aggregation of people of different ethnic backgrounds but who speak the same language or family of languages and share common cultural and traditional ties – are essentially a new race, compared to the Chinese, Indians and the Arabs with their long histories of quests and conquests.
The Malay nation, therefore, covers people of various ethnic stock, including Javanese, Bugis, Bawean, Achehnese, Thai, orang asli, the indigenous people of Sabah and Sarawak and descendants of Indian Muslims who had married local women.
Beneath these variations, however, there is a common steely core that is bent on changing the Malay persona from its perceived lethargic character to one that is brave, bold and ready to take on the world. "
The definition of “Malay” is therefore simply a collection of people's who speak a similar type language. With what is meant by a similar type language does not mean that the words are similar. Linguists call this the "Lego-type" language, where words are added on to the root word to make meaning and give tenses and such. Somehow, the Indonesians disagree with this classification and insist on being called "Indonesians" even though the majority of "Malays" have their roots in parts of Indonesia? They refuse to be called "Malay"…. Anyhow you may define it.
The writer failed to identify (probably didn't know), that the "Malay" definition also includes, the Champa, Dong Song, HoabinHian, The Taiwanese Alisan and the Philippino Aetas. He also did not identify that the "Orang Asli" are (for lack of a better term) ex-Africans. If you try to call any one of our East Malaysian brothers an "Orang Asli", they WILL BEAT YOU UP! I had to repeat this because almost all West Malaysians make the same mistake when we cross the South China Sea. Worse, somehow, they feel even more insulted when you call them “Malay”. Somehow, “kurang ajar” is uttered below their breath as if “Malay” was a really bad word for them. I’m still trying to figure this one out.
Watch “Malays in Africa”; a Museum Negara produced DVD. Also, the “Champa Malays” by the same.
With this classification, they MUST also include the Phillipinos, the Papua New Guineans, the Australian Aboroginies, as well as the Polynesian Aboroginies. These are of the Australo Melanesians who migrated out of Africa 60,000yrs ago.
Getting interesting? Read on...
"Malay" should also include the Taiwanese singer "Ah Mei" who is Alisan as her tribe are the anscestors of the "Malays". And finally, you will need to define the Southern Chinese (Southern Province) as Malay also, since they are from the same stock 6,000yrs ago.
Try calling the Bugis a "Malay". Interestingly, the Bugis, who predominantly live on Sulawesi are not even Indonesians. Neither do they fall into the same group as the migrating Southern Chinese of 6,000yrs ago nor the Australo Melanesian group from Africa.
Ready for this?
The Bugis are the cross-breed between the Chinese and the Arabs. (FYI, a runaway Ming Dynasty official whom Cheng Ho was sent to hunt down) Interestingly, the Bugis were career Pirates in the Johor-Riau Island areas. Now the nephew of Daeng Kemboja was appointed the First Sultan of Selangor. That makes the entire Selangor Sultanate part Arab, part Chinese! Try talking to the Bugis Museum curator near Kukup in Johor. Kukup is located near the most south-western tip of Johor. (Due south of Pontian Kechil)
Let's not even get into the Hang Tuah, Hang Jebat, Hang Kasturi, Hang Lekiu, and Hang Lekir, who shared the same family last name as the other super famous "Hang" family member... Hang Li Poh. And who was she? the princess of a Ming Dynasty Emperor who was sent to marry the Sultan of Malacca. Won't that make the entire Malacca Sultanate downline "Baba" ? Since the older son of the collapsed Malaccan Sultanate got killed in Johor, (the current Sultanate is the downline of the then, Bendahara) the only other son became the Sultan of Perak. Do we see any Chinese-ness in Raja Azlan? Is he the descendant of Hang Li Poh?
Next question. If the Baba’s are part Malay, why have they been marginalized by NOT BEING BUMIPUTERA? Which part of “Malay” are they not? Whatever the answer, why then are the Portugese of Malacca BUMIPUTERA? Did they not come 100yrs AFTER the arrival of the first Baba’s? Parameswara founded Malacca in 1411. The Portugese came in 1511, and the Dutch in the 1600’s. Strangely, the Baba’s were in fact once classified a Bumiputera, but a decided that they were strangely “declassified” in the 1960’s. WHY?
The Sultan of Kelantan had similar roots to the Pattani Kingdom making him of Thai origin. And what is this "coffee table book" by the Sultan of Perlis claiming to be the direct descendant of the prophet Muhammed? Somehow we see Prof Khoo Khay Khim’s signature name on the book. I’ll pay good money to own a copy of it myself. Anyone has a spare?
So, how many of you have met with orang Asli’s? the more northern you go, the more African they look. Why are they called Negrito’s? It is a Spanish word, from which directly transalates “mini Negros”. The more southern you go, the more “Indonesian” they look. And the ones who live at Cameron Highlands kinda look 50-50. You can see the Batek at Taman Negara, who really look like Eddie Murphy to a certain degree. Or the Negritos who live at the Thai border near Temenggor Lake (north Perak). The Mah Meri in Carrie Island look almost like the Jakuns in Endau Rompin. Half African, half Indonesian.
By definition, (this is super eye-opening) there was a Hindu Malay Empire in Kedah. Yes, I said right… The Malays were Hindu. It was, by the old name Langkasuka. Today known as Lembah Bujang. This Hindu Malay Empire was 2,000yrs old. Pre-dating Borrobudor AND Angkor Watt. Who came about around 500-600yrs later. Lembah Bujang was THE mighty trading empire, and its biggest influence was by the Indians who were here to help start it. By definition, this should make the Indians BUMIPUTERAS too since they were here 2,000yrs ago! Why are they marginalized?
Of the 3 books listed, "Contesting Malayness" (about S$32 for soft cover) is "banned” in Malaysia; you will need to "smuggle" it into Malaysia; for very obvious reasons.... :( or read it in Singapore if you don’t feel like breaking the law.
The other, "Kingdoms of the Indonesian Archipelago, and the Malay Peninsular" (about RM84) are openly sold at all leading bookshops; Kinokuniya, MPH, Borders, Popular, Times, etc. You should be able to find a fair bit of what I’ve been quoting in this book too, but mind you, it is very heavy reading material, and you will struggle through the initial 200+ pages. It is extremely technical in nature. Maybe that’s why it wasn’t banned (yet)…coz our authorities couldn’t make head or tail of it? (FYI, if I wasn’t doing research for my film, I wouldn’t have read it in its entirety)
While the "Sejarah Melayu" (about RM 35) is available at the University Malaya bookshop. I have both the English and Royal Malay version published by MBRAS.
Incidentally, the Professor (Author) was invited to speak on this very subject about 2 yrs ago, in KL, invited by the MBRAS. You can imagine the "chaos" this seminar created...... :(
There were actually many sources for these findings. Any older Philippino Museum Journal also carries these migration stories. This migration is also on display at the Philippines National Museum in Luzon. However, they end with the Aeta, and only briefly mention that the migration continued to Indonesia and Malaysia, but fully acknowledge that all Philippinos came from Taiwan. And before Taiwan, China. There is another book (part of a series) called the "Archipelago Series" endorsed by Tun Mahatir and Marina Mohammad, which states the very same thing right at the introduction on page one. “… that the Malays migrated out of Southern China some 6,000yrs ago…”. I believe it is called the “Pre-History of Malaysia” Hard Cover, about RM99 found in (mostly) MPH. They also carry “Pre-History of Indonesia” by the same authors for the same price.
It is most interesting to note that our Museum officials invented brand new unheard-of terms such as "Proto-Malay" and "Deutero-Malay", to replace the accepted Scientific Term, Australo-Melanesians (African descent) and Austronesians (Chinese Descent, or Mongoloid to be precise) in keeping in line with creating this new “Malay” term.. They also created the new term called the Melayu-Polynesian. (Which Melayu exists in the Polynesian Islands?) Maybe they were just trying to be “Patriotic” and “Nationalistic”… who knows…? After all, we also invented the term, “Malaysian Time”. While the rest of the world calls it “Tardy” and “Late”. It’s quite an embarrassment actually…. Singaporeans crossing the border are asked to set their watches back by about 100yrs, to adjust to “Malaysian Time”…
In a nutshell, the British Colonial Masters, who, for lack of a better description, needed a “blanket” category for ease of classification, used the term “Malay”.
The only other logical explanation, which I have heard, was that “Malaya” came as a derivative of “Himalaya”, where at Langkasuka, or Lembah Bujang today was where the Indians were describing the locals as “Malai” which means “Hill People” in Tamil. This made perfect sense as the focal point at that time was at Gunung Jerai, and the entire Peninsular had a “Mountain Range” “Banjaran Titiwangsa”, as we call it.
The Mandarin and Cantonese accurately maintain the accurate pronunciation of “Malai Ren” and “Malai Yun” respectively till this very day. Where “ren” and “yun” both mean “peoples”.
Interestingly, “Kadar” and “Kidara”, Hindi and Sanskrit words accurately describe “Kedah” of today. They both mean “fertile Land for Rice cultivation. Again, a name given by the Indians 2,000yrs ago during the “Golden Hindu Era” for a duration of 1,500yrs.
It was during the “Golden Hindu Era” that the new term which the Hindu Malay leaders also adopted the titles, “Sultan” and “Raja”. The Malay Royalty were Hindu at that time, as all of Southeast Asia was under strong Indian influence, including Borrobudor, and Angkor Watt. Bali today still practices devout Hindu Beliefs. The snake amulet worn by the Sultans of today, The Royal Dias, and even the “Pelamin” for weddings are tell-tale signs of these strong Indian influences. So, it was NOT Parameswara who was the first Sultan in Malaya. Sultanage existed approximately 1,500years before he set foot on the Peninsular during the "Golden Hindu Era" of Malaysia. And they were all Hindu.
“PreHistory of Malaysia” also talks about the “Lost Kingdom” of the “Chi-Tu” where the local Malay Kingdom were Buddhists. The rest of the “Malays” were Animistic Pagans.
But you may say, "Sejarah Melayu" calls it "Melayu"? Yes, it does. Read it again; is it trying to describe the 200-odd population hamlet near Palembang by the name "Melayu"?(Google Earth will show this village).
By that same definition, then, the Achehnese should be considered a “race”. So should the Bugis and the Bataks, to be fair. Orang Acheh, Orang Bugis, Orang Laut, Orang Melayu now mean the same… descriptions of ethnic tribes, at best. And since the “Malays” of today are not all descendants of the “Melayu” kampung in Jambi (if I remember correctly), the term Melayu has been wrongly termed. From day one. Maybe this is why the Johoreans still call themselves either Bugis, or Javanese until today. So do the Achehnese on the West coast of Kedah & Perlis and the Kelantanese insist that they came from Champa, Vietnam.
Morover, the fact that the first 3 pages claiming that "Melayu" comes from Alexander the Great and the West Indian Princess doesn't help. More importantly, it was written in 1623. By then, the Indians had been calling the locals “Malai” for 1,500 yrs already. So the name stuck….
And with the Sejarah Melayu (The Malay Annals in page 1-3) naming the grandson of Iskandar Zulkarnain, and the West Indian Princess forming the Minangkabau. Whenever a Malay is asked about it, he usually says it is "Karut" (bullshit), but all Malayan based historians insist on using Sejarah Melayu as THE main reference book for which "Malay" history is based upon. The only other books are “Misa Melayu”, "Hikayat Merong Mahawangsa", and “Hikayat Hang Tuah” which is of another long and sometimes “heated” discussion.
I find this strange.
I also find, that it is strange that the "Chitti's" (Indian+Malay) of Malacca are categorized as Bumiputera, while their Baba brothers are not. Why? Both existed during the Parameswara days. Which part of the “Malay” side of the Baba’s is not good enough for Bumiputera classification? Re-instate them. They used to be Bumiputera pre 1960’s anyway.
Instead of "Malay", I believe that "Maphilindo" (circa 1963) would have been the closest in accurately trying to describe the Malays. However, going by that definition, it should most accurately be "MaphilindoThaiChinDiaVietWanGreekCamfrica". And it is because of this; even our University Malaya Anthropology professors cannot look at you in the eye and truthfully say that the word "Malay" technically and accurately defines a race.
This is most unfortunate.
So, in a nutshell, the “Malays” (anthropologists will disagree with this “race” definition) are TRULY ASIA !!! For once the Tourism Ministry got it right….
We should stop calling this country “Tanah Melayu” instead call it, “Tanah Truly Asia”
You must understand now, why I was "tickled pink" when I found out that the Visit Malaysia slogan for 2007 was "Truly Asia". They are so correct... (even though they missed out Greece and Africa)
BTW, the name UMNO should be changed to UTANO the new official acronym for “United Truly Asia National Organization” . After all, they started out as a Bugis club in Johor anyway….
I told you all that I hate race classifications…. This is so depressing. Even more depressing is that the "malays" are not even a race; not since day one.
“Truly Asia Boleh”
2:25 AM
Che'gu KTN:
Si-awang tu memang selalu bawa problem pada boss dia. Tu yg jenih p_l_ _q kawaq la che'gu.
kalau yg bukan jenih kawaq macamana pulak?
Bergen: I read that posting a few weeks ago in penerikbeca's blog. I think its from the same guy.
I think the indentification along racial lines is for political and social purpose. Not only was it done now but since...?
In the first place , what is this guy's agenda in bringing up this issue? His hatred towards the Malays? he must remember when we were born we were never given a chance to choose what race we wanted to be in, right? That is something which we have to accept.
I read somewhere in the internet regarding the tracing of human movements in the early years. The researchers used DNA tracing to do this. Their conclusion: all human race came out from Africa from a single parent(Adam?). They first stayed in the Middle East regions for thousands of years. Some moved on to the north towards what is Europe and some to the East to the Indian sub-continent. From India part of them moved south along Burma and goes into Siam and Nusantara( Malay penisular and Indonesia now). From there they northward to Indochine and later to what is China now.
So according to the DNA tracing there were Malays first before there was any Chinese!
We can argue with this Michael Chick all we want, but what can we achieve from it? So what is the Chinese are there first? So what if the Malays are decendents of the Chinese? And so what if the Malays are there before the Chinese? That the Chinese are decendents of the Malays?
I don't see any use of it at all.
Maybe for people like Michael Chick it is important. If Michael is a Malaysian( i doubt it) and a Chinese in race, he will have a reason to be upset. Why shouldn't he! The Malaysian govt is uphelding the Malay privileges and Michael is upset with this arrangement.
Michael can say/write whatever he wants. All that he wrote are theories. Just like the one I read about the DNA theories. They are just theories. By using these theories does it improve our lives? Does it make us more unite among the races? Don't think so.
So what do you think of this Micael Chick's agenda is bro?
Bergen:
The article i read was in National Geographic website titled "The greatest journey ever"( published in 2002 or 2003)
Tanya kat depa 'what difference does it make. Orang Melayu gelar diri mereka Melayu, bukan Malay. Yang tu orang putih yang kata. Kalau orang2 dulu yang mai sini dari China ka Afrika ka, India ka, apa kita peduli. Must we apologise for where our decendents vome from? Our decendents came here, lived here, evolve a language and commonly called themselves Melayu, so what is this big deal about there not being a Malay Race?
Apa maksud penulis tu coming in the midst of the Lina Joy controversy?
Kalau purely academic cari forum yang sesuai la. Dia kata 'kalau call a Bugis a Malay' depa tak terima. Now go and call a Malay 'hey orang keturunan Cina' and see if you don't get a kick in the ass.
Apa la punya lembu depa ni.
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